The author’s Notice: This Episode is easily the closest approximation to reality in the series.Please refrain if you are among those who are jelly-hearted.Amen!
(continue from Episode 3:The Grim Society)
The scene flashed to the first backlash in his relationship. One evening at college, many years ago.She came across that same long road with that ramp-model like walk.She told him it cant be a committed relationship anymore.That she will chose to make it an open one. “Huh! After she being the person who got into the relationship ? After she being the one who literally influenced to make a commitment since the first day ? After she made all those emotional dialogues to make his otherwise practical spirit more and more emotionally attached to her? Are all those lines of her fake, just so that she could hurt him? “
Such were the thoughts coming up within him.But he forcefully suppressed them .Wouldn’t allow them to come up. Why ? Because he loved her and thats it! You might think of a ,million so-called pragmatic reasons to break things that are beautiful and joyous. But you just need a feeling, a strong human will to think that some things are just right and fight for what you believed in and not what the world thought was right.Ehsaas – the elders called it ! And one such thing the boy believed was this relationship. And her act of fidgeting around with that trust was breaking him, shrinking him, affecting his studies, but he held on because she was his world.”Impossible to exist without you” ,she said when they started seeing each other. She made him believe that the relationship was his path to happiness.Was all that show of mad love fake ?
“You okay son?” Raghavan said.By this time the ghostly old man moved around the table and landed behind the seated Vikram. His hand on Vicky’s shoulder.Vikram was speechless! He suddenly realized . He wasn’t happy !! He had been suffering everyday for the last several years thanks to his girlfriend-turned-wife, inspite of them ending up together, inspite of them making it through endless break-ups and patch-ups, insipte of …. shit !!! The fact is ….
“I am not happy …I was never happy … I hate this woman” his inner voice suddenly cleared up and is now yelling!
The realization finally dawned !!!
“Sir ! She never loved me” He started like a kid whose birthday present had just been snatched away.”She always made use of me, dominated me.She used to break up whenever she wanted to.And patched up whenever she wanted because in her eyes, I was a dog ..a frigging dog, who can be taken for granted. She was so unsure of the relationship that till the day we married, no one even knew that I was her boy friend.”
The Biz-lord, the master of all practicality was for once, talking like a helpless kid, driven by nothing but his apprehensions, his frustrations , his angst, His feelings felt as vain as dust now.
All the effort of the past, all the pains of working hard inspite of emotional havoc so that he could get into a good B-school, all the effort to get the highest job, all the effort into starting his own company so that he reached unprecedented heights, was all for her !?!?! To please her.To give her a sense of security.To make her proud of him THough in love, you are not supposed to wish such materialistic things out of someone you love. But he had been put through hell and back so that he could win her, so that he could convince her dad. And all that for which he wanted her love in return, her unconditional love …but it was always a trial-&-error for her and nothing else.
The thoughts clamored for priority. After so many years his mind finally opened up and his soul was crumbling.He went on , “Her dad! Her dad was a philanderer with extra-marital affairs and even illicit children. Her brother was a cursed womanist who used to use and throw girls like they were disposable syringes.The whole family was like that.Yet I thought that she is different, covered up all their histories in order to convince my parents. She had an ex boy friend. I am no bloody chiavunist and don’t have a problem with that. But no one knew why she ditched him, they , even the best of her friends say its for no reason .. .just like that, and the chap was destroyed! And since then, I lived with a fear that it was not love but selfish opportunity ,that drives her. Yet I never let that fear that she would do the same thing to me come out. Shucks! I should have realized that a snake is born out of a family of snakes.”
“Cool down son! Cool down” said Raghavan , “Not washing dirty linen in public are we? ”
“I am not Raghavan sir ,,its the truth … not my opinion but the bland truth which I have been scared to accept in the last 10 years 😦 .Even after marriage, she always poisoned my mind against my own parents, against my people for her own interests. And I only listened to her , out of blind attachment to her, out of my stupid faith that a bad person will someday turn good with my love!”
Raghavan knew his diabolical mission had been accomplised. “Then you want her dead ? ”
Vikram.H.Saha, the conqueror of the business world, saw the entire issue for the first time in a Machiavellian manner, “Yes ! Yes! Exacta mundo ..thats what I want.I want her dead. All our property has a joint custody.She doesn’t deserve that …she should be killed. I dont want my kids to be under her snake-like influence”
(to be concluded in the next episode … a cruel climax )
(Episode end) verse of the day:
Finding I’m more lost than found when she’s not around.
When she’s not around I feel it coming down.
– ‘Out of the Fire’ by Finger Eleven